The Discomfort of Faith

by Fr Earl Allyson Valdez

Reflection  for the Twenty-Seventh Sunday in Ordinary Time

We are so used to hearing conversion stories which arise from “good” feelings. There are those who turn to the Christian faith because they have either seen and felt something good after entering the Church, or because it was through belief that they were able to get out of dangerous or desperate situations. Or probably, there were those who, after having experienced certain fortunes in life, felt that it was proper to credit all of these to the Lord. 

In other words, believing has been closely linked to relief, happiness, clarity, or consolation.

Of course, these are essential characteristics of faith and are things that lead to faith. Our readings today, however, remind us that faith is not always glitter and gold. If at all, the quality of our faith in the Lord becomes truly manifest in the times in which the storms of life come and test our convictions. 

We see this struggle with faith in the first reading, when the voice of the prophet Habakkuk cries for justice and righteousness in a God that doesn't seem to exist. One can imagine how real the struggle is upon seeing the vision of destruction and violence, with the prophet's words highlighting desperation. Yet, in the midst of this, the Lord answered the prophet: those who have remained steadfast in their faith, those who have remained just in the midst of all things that break and shatter the soul, shall live. Though His response would not come at an instant, it will come according to the Lord's will. 

The same spirit of steadfastness in faith can be seen in St. Paul, who I think is the master of prose when it comes to holding on to faith in the midst of struggles within and outside one's own soul. He always reminds us that what our faith gives is clarity in the midst of confusion, love and self-control in the midst of chaos, and the Holy Spirit’s guidance in the midst of the loss of direction. And mind you, the words of the so-called “Apostle of the Gentiles” contain so much truth in it,  given that these were the fruits of his own experience and encounter with the Lord. 

Finally, we get to the Gospel highlighting that true faith is in fact, servitude, of being able to do something but in the end, turns out to be “the bare minimum.” Surely, Our Lord does not downplay the hard work of conversion, most especially the part where our faith becomes manifested in good works and transforms completely who we are. 

But what the Lord points out to us is that, in the end, true faith does not prove to be rewarding, that is, if we think that we ought to be rewarded for what we have done for the Lord. Instead, true faith is that which humbly says that everything is only a response to the Lord who has given us so much; yes, so much even if it feels like the reward for being faithful seems very little in our eyes. But  the point remains the same: the Lord provides, according to that which He sees fit and proper for us. 

Perhaps there are things that are happening around us which come to mind upon meditating on the readings today: the massive corruption and injustice that seem to have no solution, people whom we know who have never learned their lesson, or even our very own selves that refuse conversion. Like moments of desperation, these are moments in which it is easy to lose sight of faith. Our Lord reminds us, however, that it is precisely these moments that faith is all the more needed, one that continues to open to His will, and one that continues to hope for better things as we do our part in making things happen according to His will.

What kind of faith,  then, do we have? Is it the one who remains with the good feelings of consolation, or one that is also willing to find God in moments of desperation, desolation, and seeming hopelessness?